Thursday, May 11, 2006
@ 5:14 PM
wooo... felt extremely peaceful today. my mind, my heart, all in a very calm state. a feeling which i have lost touched with for quite some time.
I think my tolerance level for boredom has ascended by a notch. my 心 feels very 静, so much so that i think i can sit down there and stare into blank space the whole day without feeling any frustration or discomfort. hmm, i like this feeling, a 忘我 level, like im in harmony with everybody and everything. There's zero negative feelings. Is this what Buddha felt while sitting under the Bodhi tree? have i attained enlightenment? =)
But then this enlightenment is a strange kind. not the 色即是空, 空即是色 type. i still think about things, but i feel happy just being immersed in my own thoughts alone. Letting my imagination run wild, creating vivid images of things and people, like gillian and alexandria. Puts a smile on my face even though i may be bored by whats happening =) i've confirmed that "absence makes the heart grow fonder". For some reason, i can picture them in greater detail than b4. maybe that has something to do with my calmness too.
haha. ok i guess im weird. But hey, i think everyone has a weird side to them. I have a pretty scary side too, but i try to exercise self control to prevent my scary side from showing too often =)
lolz. and whats the big fuss about the semakau trip grouping? i just think it doesnt really matter, though of course, i would feel luckier if placed in the same group as pple whom i am more familiar with. But i can't be bothered by such minor things.
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Myself
Name: Kai
Male, 21 and ummm... Double? =X
1 Feb 1988
Singapore
Pei Chun Public School class of 6A 2000
Raffles Institution class of 4R 2004
Raffles Junior College class of 2S03F 2006
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SISPEC Hotel Coy
0107 AISL
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Reminisce
Thursday, May 11, 2006
@ 5:14 PM
wooo... felt extremely peaceful today. my mind, my heart, all in a very calm state. a feeling which i have lost touched with for quite some time.
I think my tolerance level for boredom has ascended by a notch. my 心 feels very 静, so much so that i think i can sit down there and stare into blank space the whole day without feeling any frustration or discomfort. hmm, i like this feeling, a 忘我 level, like im in harmony with everybody and everything. There's zero negative feelings. Is this what Buddha felt while sitting under the Bodhi tree? have i attained enlightenment? =)
But then this enlightenment is a strange kind. not the 色即是空, 空即是色 type. i still think about things, but i feel happy just being immersed in my own thoughts alone. Letting my imagination run wild, creating vivid images of things and people, like gillian and alexandria. Puts a smile on my face even though i may be bored by whats happening =) i've confirmed that "absence makes the heart grow fonder". For some reason, i can picture them in greater detail than b4. maybe that has something to do with my calmness too.
haha. ok i guess im weird. But hey, i think everyone has a weird side to them. I have a pretty scary side too, but i try to exercise self control to prevent my scary side from showing too often =)
lolz. and whats the big fuss about the semakau trip grouping? i just think it doesnt really matter, though of course, i would feel luckier if placed in the same group as pple whom i am more familiar with. But i can't be bothered by such minor things.
